Point of View

From and Fuller: The Politics of Less Patriotic Voters and the Emergence of Doomers

March 30, 2023 by Al From and Craig Fuller Leave a Comment

Every Thursday, the Spy hosts a conversation with Al From and Craig Fuller on the most topical political news of the moment.

This week, From and Fuller discuss a newly-released Wall Street Journal poll that reveals that Americans are attaching less importance to values such as patriotism, religion, and community involvement. Al and Craig also comment on a new opinion piece in the Washington Post by Shannon Osaka of the emergence of “climate doomers” who believe that climate change cannot be stopped and humanity is doomed.

This video podcast is approximately 24 minutes in length. Paywalls may exist with the links provided.

To listen to the audio podcast version, please use this link:

Background

While the Spy’s public affairs mission has always been hyper-local, it has never limited us from covering national, or even international issues, that impact the communities we serve. With that in mind, we were delighted that Al From and Craig Fuller, both highly respected Washington insiders, have agreed to a new Spy video project called “The Analysis of From and Fuller” over the next year.

The Spy and our region are very lucky to have such an accomplished duo volunteer for this experiment. While one is a devoted Democrat and the other a lifetime Republican, both had long careers that sought out the middle ground of the American political spectrum.

Al From, the genius behind the Democratic Leadership Council’s moderate agenda which would eventually lead to the election of Bill Clinton, has never compromised from this middle-of-the-road philosophy. This did not go unnoticed in a party that was moving quickly to the left in the 1980s. Including progressive Howard Dean saying that From’s DLC was the Republican wing of the Democratic Party.

From’s boss, Bill Clinton, had a different perspective. He said it would be hard to think of a single American citizen who, as a private citizen, has had a more positive impact on the progress of American life in the last 25 years than Al From.”

Al now lives in Annapolis and spends his semi-retirement as a board member of the Medill School of Journalism at Northwestern University (his alma mater) and authoring New Democrats and the Return to Power. He also is an adjunct faculty member at Johns Hopkins’ Krieger School and recently agreed to serve on the Annapolis Spy’s Board of Visitors. He is the author of “New Democrats and the Return to Power.”

For Craig Fuller, his moderation in the Republican party was a rare phenomenon. With deep roots in California’s GOP culture of centralism, Fuller, starting with a long history with Ronald Reagan, leading to his appointment as Reagan’s cabinet secretary at the White House, and later as George Bush’s chief-of-staff and presidential campaign manager was known for his instincts to find the middle ground. Even more noted was his reputation of being a nice guy in Washington, a rare characteristic for a successful tenure in the White House.

Craig has called Easton his permanent home for the last five years, where now serves on the boards of the Academy Art Museum, the Benedictine School, and Chesapeake Bay Maritime Museum. He also serves on the Spy’s Board of Visitors.

With their rich experience and long history of friendship, now joined by their love of the Chesapeake Bay, they have agreed through the magic of Zoom, to talk inside politics and policy with the Spy every Thursday.

There’s an App for that… by Angela Rieck

March 30, 2023 by Angela Rieck Leave a Comment

My phone contains apps for my bed, my oven, my vacuums, my heating and cooling systems, my Wi-Fi’s, my refrigerator, transit trains, flights, hotels, UBER, conventions, money, banking, email, calendar, music, statistical calculator, flashlight, credit cards, Starbucks, Walmart, eBay, weight loss, Target, Instacart, grocery stores, messenger services, games, social websites, Internet phone, Internet services, texting, cable, television channels, streaming services…and more. I grimace every time I hear that phrase, “you need you to download our app.”

I HATE it. Not only are most of these apps difficult to use, but they are also a constant reminder of my diminishing eyesight and fine motor skills.

I know, I sound like most Baby Boomers.

But first, let me give you some of my computer credentials. I went to college and graduate school during the early days of computers. I was a computer geek. The computers of the day were very primitive, especially the small ones, which were typically PDPs in the science world. Programming them required an almost intimate knowledge of how they worked. We used paper tape and programmed in hexadecimal, ASCII, assembly languages, and sometimes we even had to use binary. The larger mainframes allowed us to use higher order languages such as BASIC, SQL, and my favorite, FORTRAN. While working on several military contracts in graduate school, I had access to classified programming tools that were even more innovative. It was not unusual for me to stay up into the wee hours of the morning, debugging code.

At several points, I almost changed my major to computer science. But I saw the handwriting on the wall.

In the early years, we were allowed to write our code as our minds worked, making our code virtually impossible for someone else to debug. I knew that this was not sustainable and a concept such as structured programming (which requires programmers to follow rules and conventions) was on the horizon. I chafed at those restrictions to creativity.

But I found another area that I enjoyed almost as much as coding, understanding how humans worked with computers and designing programs to make it easier for them to use. This was called Human Factors and later Ergonomics. I loved it. Our role was to help computer programmers design an interface that was easy to use for novices, moderately skilled users, and expert users. We typically required that programmers provide 2-3 ways of doing the same task to accommodate each type of user. We focused on the needs of the aging population, the harried middle-aged user, and the impatient youth. We conducted usability studies to assess how each type of user could perform important tasks. Our measurements were the reduction of errors (especially catastrophic ones), ability to perform the task without manuals, minimizing frustration, and speed. We focused on human perceptual capabilities and limitations; designing the most important components to be placed where the eye typically goes. We looked into the issue of nystagmus (rapid eye movements required for vision), color deficiencies, motor skills, cultural differences, computer expertise, and age-related issues. We took everything that we knew about human perception and designed programs to take advantage of our capabilities and overcome our disabilities.

While working on my dissertation, I inadvertently created an early videogame. Psychology 101 students are required to sign up for several experimental credits (which gives graduate students and professors access to “human guinea pigs”). I was testing the concept of a parallel processing ability. All of the mathematical models at the time showed that humans processed serially, namely they could not do two tasks simultaneously, but instead they did each task very quickly. But after observing mothers, I became convinced that there had to be some type of parallel processing ability. To test this, I designed and programmed a computer “game,” where subjects had to do two tasks at once. One was a monitoring task (making sure a cursor stayed in a box); the other was a recall task (remembering, numbers, letters, and crudely drawn figures). Every time I put up signup sheets, they were filled with “volunteers” within in an hour. Some students would cross someone’s name out so that they could fill in the slot. While other grad students begged for human subjects, I had to turn mine away. Never got it. Never understood what I had.

At Bell Laboratories, and later as a consultant, I was able to work on cutting edge technologies and even designed a financial website that is widely used today. I helped design a lot of “back end” systems (those systems that control electronic and optical transmission, Bluetooth, and early shopping sites), decades before they came into popular use.

But, while I was working, technology development was going through a sea change. Developers left the East Coast labs and Universities and moved to Silicon Valley. And when technology moved to Silicon Valley, our time consuming usability designs became too unattractive and too slow. The new programmers were young and with Apple leading the way, more focused on style and “coolness.” To accommodate venture capitalists, technology needed to come to the market quickly. To do that, there could be no accommodations for different types of users. So, UI designers and programmers wrote code for people like themselves.

Their designs are much more aesthetically pleasing than mine were. Their “look and feel” is sophisticated and artistic. Even with the help of a graphic designer, my designs were functional, and therefore, obsolete.

Which brings us to where we are now. Apps are designed by and for Gen X and younger, leaving us Baby Boomers in the dust.

Despite my computer knowledge, I have difficulty with many apps. My eyes struggle to read the small print and when I change the phone settings to larger type, most screens become incomprehensible (my Google password screen is a jumble of words). My QWERTY trained fingers are not dexterous enough to enter the information on the tiny phone key display quickly or accurately. The microphone doesn’t appear to understand my accent (or mumbling, perhaps). And it takes a long time to enter and find information in an app.

When confronted with the need for an app, I beg the rep to give me a way to do it on the computer, instead. On a computer, my error rate is much lower, and my throughput is much faster. But more and more companies/programs, especially the smaller ones, only offer apps.

Which brings me to my current problem. My pool pump in Florida failed, so my pool service installer replaced my pump. Unbeknownst to me, he replaced it with a pump that requires an app. No more manual switches for me. Except the “geniuses” that thought it was a good idea to put pool pump controls on an app, neglected to realize that most of us do not have and do not want to have our Wi-Fi service available outside of our homes. And pool pumps are always outside and, due to their noise, as far from the house as possible. My new pump has no other means to control it other than an app and since my Wi-Fi signal is not sufficiently strong outside, I cannot turn my pump on or off, manage the flow rate, or set a time schedule. I am reduced to using my circuit breaker to turn my pump on and off, and I am unable to access the other features. Furthermore, I didn’t learn that this pump required an app until a week after its installation when I was unable to turn it off after it began malfunctioning.

I did not handle this well.

Apparently, my pool installer’s supplier no longer offers a pool pump with manual or even electronic controls. I demanded some type of control over the pump, besides the circuit breaker. The installer suggested that I pay to upgrade my Wi-Fi capabilities to extend their range. I did not agree with that solution, as one can hack even a “secure” Wi-Fi system. Fortunately, it appears that the pump manufacturer recognizes they made a mistake and are developing a new pump (more expensive, of course) that does not require an app and has the controls on the pump on an electronic pad.

Since I am returning to Maryland before that new pump can be installed and my Wi-Fi is not strong enough for my current pump, I am very frustrated, even angry, at the possibility of the damage that could happen in my absence. Obviously, I need to calm down and patiently wait for a new, controllable pump. I need to accept our new reality.

Fortunately, there is an app for that.

Angela Rieck, a Caroline County native, received her PhD in Mathematical Psychology from the University of Maryland and worked as a scientist at Bell Labs, and other high-tech companies in New Jersey before retiring as a corporate executive. Angela and her dogs divide their time between St Michaels and Key West Florida. Her daughter lives and works in New York City.

Once Again by Al Sikes

March 29, 2023 by Al Sikes 2 Comments

Reflect with me for a moment. We knew the children who were shot and killed in Nashville. And the adults. They are our neighbors.

We have seen 9-year-old children gleefully following their parents at school events or walking down the aisle in church or on the playground. And we know those late career professionals who have dedicated their lives to education. They are all a part of our community.

They all became targets of a deranged mind. While those in charge look for motives, we know warped minds don’t lend themselves to understandable motives. But what we do understand is the reckless availability of guns first designed for military use. Guns that in seconds can cause a school corridor to look like a battlefield.

Almost two years ago to this date I wrote a column on guns. Enumerable times since, I have started to put pen to paper on the issue of how we deal with guns but each time pulled back. It is not an easy subject. But I am drawn to the flame.

Let me begin illustratively with technology. It has increased gun lethality but it has not been used widely to increase protection. Biometric keys, passwords and the like personalize and protect our homes, cars, phones and more. Protective technology’s use in manufacturing and retrofitting of guns should become as ubiquitous.

But then there is the larger problem. Can citizens act or must all the action be shunted off to politicians who will engage once again in the theater of the absurd? And much of the political activity will occur on a State-by-State basis and the problem is national.

Any steps of consequence will not be taken swiftly and actions that lessen problems in the long run will not sate our immeasurable desire for quick results. So why not go long as I have suggested before. We need a nationwide campaign to amend the Second Amendment.

Women’s rights, for example, received a huge boost from a nationwide effort to add an Equal Rights Amendment to the Constitution. The amendment failed but the drive made women’s rights topical and constructive actions followed. And, for those of us who were watching our draft status during the Vietnam War, we know that the momentum of the anti-war movement hurried our troops return.

Additions to the Constitution are difficult. If the Second Amendment is to be amended, the addition should be simple, clear, limited and broadly appealing. My suggestion, a second sentence that says: The possession and use of military weapons and their derivatives can be regulated.

Today there are many efforts to regulate gun possession but often gun ownership or use that doesn’t need to be regulated gets swept up in our zeal to regulate military-style weapons. A successful drive will recognize our nation’s history with guns used for lawful purposes.

It is beyond this brief essay to detail either constitutional or legal language to lessen the threat from guns being used by deranged or vengeful minds. We have, however, come to a point where the nationwide outrage should push lawmakers beyond their well-practiced talking points.

Al Sikes is the former Chair of the Federal Communications Commission under George H.W. Bush. Al writes on themes from his book, Culture Leads Leaders Follow published by Koehler Books.

Take a Closer Look at Trump 2.0 by J.E. Dean

March 29, 2023 by J.E. Dean 2 Comments

Call me a masochist, but I watched the entirety of Donald Trump’s March 25 rally in Waco, Texas. I watched it to confirm my belief that he is getting crazier. I was curious about what he might say about his possible indictment by the Manhattan DA. I wondered what sort of crowd he would attract and how it would react to a typical Trump rant. I got all those answers, but I also got a primer on the policy proposals that Trump would pursue if (heaven forbid) he returned to the White House.

I had assumed I knew all about Trump’s policies. In a way, we all have made such assumptions. Ask people on the street what Trump stands for, and they will mention Trump’s wall, trade, America First, lower taxes, fewer regulations, opposition to climate change, and “culture wars.” Those who hate Trump will mention racism, his history of sexual assaults, grift, the January 6 insurrection, and The Big Lie.

In Waco, Donald Trump delivered a 92-minute speech. I did not have my stopwatch out, but more than an hour was about himself. Trump lamented the “weaponization” of the justice system that he claims has victimized him with endless unfair and ungrounded investigations. He vilified his supposed torturers, calling them Marxists, scumbags, globalists, and Democrats.

He also surprised me by playing a rendition of the right-wing anthem, “Justice for All,” performed by a choir of people jailed for the January 6 insurrection. While they sang, a video screen showed pictures of the riot. Later in the speech, the defeated ex-president said, “some of them are patriots.”

Watching the first hour of Trump’s speech was a challenge. Unlike in-person attendees, I could press the pause button to take a break from the endless stream of complaints about the 2020 election and much more. Press reports suggest that a noticeable number of attendees streamed out of the event before it was over. That’s not surprising given the Texas heat and what, to that point, was Trump being Trump.

Eventually, Trump turned to what he would do if re-elected. Focusing on those proposals or claims that are not already widely known, here are a few things worth remembering:

After suggesting that President Biden is leading the world into World War III, Trump claimed that only his election could prevent it. He did not elaborate on which Biden’s policies were making a world war inevitable, but they appear to focus on Ukraine.

Trump claimed the Russian invasion of Ukraine would never have happened if he were president. He implied that his relationship with Vladimir Putin was the key. He then indicated that if elected president in November 2024, he would settle the Ukraine war “within 24 hours,” acting even before he was inaugurated.

Trump promised to “clean up America” not only by curtailing illegal immigration but by executing “the largest mass deportation” in history. After claiming that “smart” dictators and others were emptying prisons, insane asylums, and mental institutions and sending the inmates/patients to the U.S., Trump indicated he would send them back. If the “original countries” refused to take them back, Trump said he would cut off all American aid.

Trump also said he would address growing Chinese economic and military power. He plans an all-out trade war against China to stop the importation of most Chinese goods. Trump did not address how such a trade embargo might impact the U.S. economy or how the Chinese might react.

Education is also a focus of Trump’s policy proposals. He did not call for improving the quality of schools or making American students more competitive in science, technology, engineering, or math. Instead, he promised to prohibit federal funds to any school with a vaccine or mask policy or that permitted the teaching of critical race theory. Also, taking a page from Florida Governor Ron “DeSanctimonius,” he called for parental control of schools. He condemned the “mutilation of children” and an end to “the participation of men in women’s sports.” Trump indicated parents should have the right to fire school principals who “are not getting the job done.”

Not part of Trump speech, unsurprisingly, was any discussion of an issue essential to our future on the Eastern Shore—climate change. Trump bragged about his withdrawal from the “disastrous” Paris Climate Accords in his speech and repeatedly called for “restoring” American energy independence.

These are not the only Trump policy proposals mentioned (or not mentioned) in the speech, but, in my view, are the most important. . . .

Curiously, while writing this piece, I searched in vain for a transcript of Trump’s remarks. I found none. I reviewed Trump’s speech by listening to the entire hour and 40 minutes and reading various news reports. Does the “fake news” industry have it in for Trump? In a way, it does. Trump has lied so often and engages in so much offensive rhetoric that the mainstream press tends to ignore him. Trump considers that unfair. Maybe it is, but it is also unfortunate. To understand the risk of Trump winning the White House in 2024, it is necessary to understand the issues he is running on and the promises he is making.

Some of the nation’s most prestigious newspapers and media outlets have ceased following Trump. I could not find coverage of the speech in The New York Times. The Washington Post had an article, but it was a feed from the Associated Press—the paper that prides itself on its coverage of politics apparently did not send its own reporter to Waco. What does that tell you?

If you still support Trump or believe he is being treated unfairly, I urge you to watch the video. It is available on C-SPAN without any editorial comment. If you have already rejected Trump and pray nightly for him to disappear from the political stage, I urge you to listen to the speech. Only by knowing Trump can you ensure his defeat.

J.E. Dean is a retired attorney and public affairs consultant writing on politics, government, and other subjects.

Out and About (Sort of): Academic Freedom and the Right to be Appalling by Howard Freedlander

March 28, 2023 by Howard Freedlander 2 Comments

Dr. Amy Wax is a conservative flamethrower at the University of Pennsylvania Law School. She is a tenured professor who is now facing sanctions for her perceived racist comments both in and outside the classroom.

Does she use freedom of speech as a coaxer or a cudgel?

To this Penn undergraduate alum, her comments are alarming, if not abhorrent.

I have spent weeks thinking about this column. I have sought the opinions of friends who are attorneys whose intellectual depth I respect. Still, I sit alone on a writer’s island awaiting clarity from my ephemeral muse. It can be a lonely perch.

Dr. Wax, a neurologist as well as a lawyer and professor, undeniably opposes affirmative action. Her chronically inflammatory comments reflect disdain for Blacks who eschew bourgeois values, question the cognitive aptitude of African- American students and criticize Asian students who strive for conformity and vote Democratic.

She aligns herself with White Nationalists. Her public statements bluntly condemn wokeness and a culture that cancels conservative speakers and critics such as this determined Ivy League lightning rod. She virtually dares my alma mater to remove her tenured status. She’s a relentless warrior of free speech, unfettered by condemnation by students and colleagues.

Readers would be unsurprised to learn of my disgust for what strikes me as a pattern of bigoted remarks by a brilliant teacher who exhibits little or no reluctance or contrition to voice hurtful and hostile remarks. While her perspectives mostly happen outside the classroom, she has insulted students inside her academic realm. She decries their sensitivity; I despair of her damning asides.

She seems oblivious to the impact of her comments. In fact, she displays an attitude contemptuous of criticism from students and colleagues.

As I contemplate my position on this columnist’s weekly pedestal, I find myself defending Professor Wax’s right to utter free, though outrageous speech. I cringe more than a little bit at this conclusion. The discomfort experienced by her students is bothersome, if not outright despicable.

But she has the right to claim her niche as a conservative speaker at a university considered liberal. Her tenured status provides unassailable academic freedom. That freedom underscores the basic tenets of an educational institution unaffected by political concerns and constraints.

Amy Wax seeks no pulpit but the one offered at Penn Law. She has no political ambitions. She rejects implicit or explicit censorship. Unfortunately, she and the law school are engaged in a battle royale that produces headlines injurious to a brilliant professor and esteemed law school. The media is providing a public venue for litigation.

The dispute has been roiling the campus since 2017. Regrettably, it has attracted considerable media and academic attention. I suspect that a legal settlement is out of question since freedom of speech has become a national cause celebre. The sides are intractable.

Among friends, classmates and readers, my stance will be unpopular. I will understand their consternation. I still support Dr. Wax’s right to be appalling.

Columnist Howard Freedlander retired in 2011 as Deputy State Treasurer of the State of Maryland. Previously, he was the executive officer of the Maryland National Guard. He also served as community editor for Chesapeake Publishing, lastly at the Queen Anne’s Record-Observer. After 44 years in Easton, Howard and his wife, Liz, moved in November 2020 to Annapolis, where they live with Toby, a King Charles Cavalier Spaniel who has no regal bearing, just a mellow, enticing disposition.

Complexity by Jamie Kirkpatrick

March 28, 2023 by Jamie Kirkpatrick 2 Comments

Last week, I was thinking about “clarity,” so this week, I thought I’d tackle “complexity.” My first instinct was to begin with a definition, so I dove into Wikipedia which defined complexity this way: “complexity characterizes the behavior of a system or model whose components interact in multiple ways and follow local rules, leading to nonlinearity, randomness, collective dynamics, hierarchy, and emergence.” That was gibberish, way too complex for me. I decided to start elsewhere…

We all know “simple.” Simple is, well, just that: simple. Direct, uncluttered, clear as a mountain stream. By contrast, complexity is a river of doubt that winds its way through a maze, meandering, advancing and retreating, twisting and turning its way forward before doubling back on itself until it creates a whole that is greater than the sum of its separate parts. It’s head-scratching and mind-numbing. We might appreciate simplicity, but we are mystified and awed by complexity.

Take a look at the photo that accompanies this Musing. Just some sheets of canvas and some rigging, right? All we need is a breeze to move us along. But we know it’s not that simple. The task of moving a big wooden boat through water is deceptively complex. It requires not only enough wind and the proper equipment, but also considerable skill, intuition, knowledge, tactics, and ingenuity. Sailing is a whole that is greater than the sum of its parts.

Let’s face it: life itself is complex. There was a time, long ago, when I read The Road Less Traveled by M. Scott Peck. I think I had just entered the weeds of midlife and I was searching for some perspective. Mr. Peck made a lot of sense to me back then; in fact, he still does. If nothing else, he certainly understands the complexity of life; just listen to this: “Abandon the urge to simplify everything, to look for formulas and easy answers, and begin to think multidimensionally, to glory in the mystery and paradoxes of life, not to be dismayed by the multitude of causes and consequences that are inherent in each experience — (but) to appreciate the fact that life is complex.”

We want, maybe even crave, easy answers to knotty problems. Alas; if life were simple, we’d all get it right, but it isn’t and we don’t. Like complexity itself, we turn back on ourselves, relive our mistakes, rue our bad fortune, or wallow like of one Harlow’s lab monkeys in a self-imposed pit of despair. Nothing seems simple, not getting out of bed, not even breathing. Complexity looms over everything like a dark, threatening cloud, one that seems to exclude everything, even light and love. We lose contact with the world and each other. Ashes, ashes, we all fall down…

But I think there’s a way out. If we can accept the fact that we’re surrounded by complexity, then maybe we can separate its multiple strands and weave a simpler cloth. I’m not talking about running away to Walden Pond, but I do think we can choose to minimize the downside of life’s complexity by embracing it, not vilifying it. Despite Gatsby, we really don’t have to beat on, like boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past. Instead, maybe we can choose to sail into tomorrow, pushed along by calm winds and following seas.

I’ll be right back.

Jamie Kirkpatrick is a writer and photographer who lives in Chestertown. His work has appeared in the Washington Post, the Baltimore Sun, the Philadelphia Inquirer, the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, the Washington College Alumni Magazine, and American Cowboy Magazine. Two collections of his essays (“Musing Right Along” and “I’ll Be Right Back”) are available on Amazon. Jamie’s website is Musingjamie.net.

Indefensible By Laura J. Oliver

March 26, 2023 by Laura J. Oliver 2 Comments

As newly discovered best friends, my daughter Audra and a ponytailed third-grade classmate were enjoying the instant intimacy of those who share the same aspirations—to possess a horse, pierced ears, and the ability to do a split.

It was the first time Audra had been invited to visit, and as we were leaving, Linda and her mother invited us to admire a pair of mourning doves, which in the confines of a homemade coop in Linda’s backyard, had produced two perfect ivory eggs. The nesting birds seemed to be juveniles, so they were somewhat small, their gray and white feathers as soft as mink, their fragile bodies sleek and without substance.

Built on a high shelf attached to the back of their house, the nest had been enclosed with three walls and a roof of chicken wire. The girls stood on cinderblocks to see into it. “Is it really all right for the two of them to be inside the enclosure?” I asked Linda’s mother. She was a science teacher, which made me feel devoid of practical skills and undereducated, but I hoped we might become friends.

“Oh, sure,” Mrs. Hall replied, distracted. Her two-year-old son Jaimie was using a blue-flowered fistful of her skirt as a tether, weaving around her knees. He crashed into her legs periodically to entertain himself, then swung away again on an elliptical orbit.

“Linda goes in there all the time. She’s so excited about having baby birds,” our hostess explained.

As we continued to watch the girls through the honeycomb of chicken wire, the doves became increasingly active, fluttering, and repositioning themselves. Linda jumped down from the cinderblocks with a soft thud and joined her mother outside the enclosure, doing a little dance in the spring grass, chatting away about what she planned to name the fledglings. Still in the enclosure, Audra continued to gaze into the nest, her forearms anchoring her precariously to the wooden shelf. Though she would never ask, I imagined she wished to adopt one of the birds when they hatched. I’d once had a similar longing.

When I was five, searching for arrowheads along the pasture fence, I glimpsed a flash of Bermuda blue in the grass. I knelt, parting sticks and leaves to get a better look. A robin’s egg—as blue as a jay’s wing, as blue as the April sky.

With one finger, I touched the smooth turquoise surface. Warm. With mounting excitement, I nudged the delicate treasure to one side. Unbroken—still protecting the tiniest and most fragile of hearts. I picked it up and struck out for home, the rhythmic thrumming of my corduroy overalls resonating like someone blowing through paper pressed to a comb.

Slipping in the backdoor, I ran upstairs and laid the egg in a bed of Kleenex which I then placed on a Thom McCann shoebox directly under the hall nightlight. The bulb emitted just enough heat to keep the egg warm, and I went in search of my overworked mother to assure her I’d be responsible for my impending offspring. That night I went to bed unable to stop talking (girl-joy, admit it, you still do that), imagining how great it would be when I taught my bird to ride on my shoulder and to speak.

At daybreak, I hopped out of bed and padded down the hall on bare feet to check on the egg. To my horror, the nightlight had been turned off sometime after I’d gone to sleep. The egg was stone cold. That afternoon I buried my charge at the base of the play yard swing set, the only witness to my inability to protect a life for which I’d taken responsibility.

I thanked Linda’s mom one last time and told Audra we had to go. Her little brother was waiting at home; I’d left a lasagna in the oven. As she retreated reluctantly from the nest, her worn tennis shoes slipped from the cinderblocks, and she was thrown off balance, grasping instinctively for the shelf as she fell. In slow motion, the entire arrangement broke away from the wall. The air was filled with beating wings; there was a crash, a child cried out.

As the chaos settled, I scanned the wreckage. A yellow yolk was sliding down the side of the house, and Audra, frozen in remorse and embarrassment, was staring in horror at the toe of her shoe. The remaining egg lay broken in the canvas creases.

Linda’s eyes met no one else’s as she reeled in closer to her mother. I tried to touch Audra through the wire wall separating us as apologies and absolutions were offered on the breeze.

“Look, Linda,” said Mrs. Hall after a few excruciating moments.

“These eggs were never fertilized!” She was examining Audra’s shoe with a clinical eye. “They would never have hatched. Maybe next time.”

We’d be friends, all right. I already loved her.

Apologizing again, unable to do anything but carry our remorse with us, Audra and I walked to the sanctuary of our second-hand Volvo. She moved with deliberate dignity as if she could do penance for this disaster by never making another spontaneous movement. She was uncharacteristically polite and arranged herself with formality on the front seat.

I was afraid to touch the fragile shell of her composure on the ride home. We spoke of practical matters, and finally, I told her about the lost robin’s egg that was as blue as her eyes and over which I had spun dreams. I wanted to take some of her disappointment from her by demonstrating I already had a place for it.

We pulled into our gravel driveway. Getting carefully out of the car, my daughter informed me that she had some things she’d like to do in her room and climbed the stairs with the self-conscious posture of an 8-year-old penitent.

Later that night, I checked on her on my way to bed. She was asleep, silky brown hair against her pillow, the white down comforter a rumpled heap that had fallen to the floor.

I stood there imagining that love is a force field. That the ferocious, abiding love we feel for our children, and sometimes extend to each other, could ward off every hurt. But that’s not how it works, of course. Hurt is the heart’s tenderizer. And it’s necessary. How can you be moved to assuage someone else’s pain if you’ve never experienced your own?

I lifted the comforter from the floor and covered her then, still intent on nurturing something breathtakingly fragile that might one day take flight.

Laura J. Oliver is an award-winning developmental book editor and writing coach, who has taught writing at the University of Maryland and St. John’s College. She is the author of The Story Within (Penguin Random House). Co-creator of The Writing Intensive at St. John’s College, she is the recipient of a Maryland State Arts Council Individual Artist Award in Fiction, an Anne Arundel County Arts Council Literary Arts Award winner, a two-time Glimmer Train Short Fiction finalist, and her work has been nominated for a Pushcart Prize. Her website can be found here.

Letter to the Editor: Serving Up Scapegoats with a Side of Hypocrisy

March 25, 2023 by Letter to Editor 2 Comments

This time in American history when economic stress and generalized anxiety is abroad in the land, as it was in post-World War I Germany, Christianity seems once again prepared to serve up scapegoats as a lightning rod for anger and frustration in its majority white population.

Beyond economic insecurity, we know that the biggest threat to the American family and its children is good ole red blooded American as apple pie infidelity. Yet the loudest voices of American Christianity are offering up the gay community as the major threat to the institution.

The political far right has been encouraged by what the religiously cast anti-abortion message has been able to do in fundraising and electoral outcomes. Now that headway has been made through Supreme Court appointments on this issue, the far right has landed on opposition to the gay community as its newest lever in the toxic electoral mix that is Christian Nationalism.

Consider some inside biblical theology baseball on sexual sin. Jesus never mentions homosexuality. He does denounce divorce and remarriage, the former only permitted if there is infidelity and remarriage in any case constituting adultery. How is it today in American Protestantism to ordain and employ divorced and remarried clergy as spiritual leaders of congregations and bless the exchange of wedding vows in remarriages.

The comfort with divorce and remarriage surely reflects an acceptance of modern understandings of personality psychology and human relationships. Where is the same deference to modern psychological understandings in biblical interpretations of gender preference and identity.

Modern biblical interpretation has made it possible for divorced and remarried congregants and clergy to bask in the comfort and acceptance of their church communities. The hypocrisy is leaving their gay brothers and sisters out in the cold to be kicked around as political footballs.

Holly Wright
Easton

Dad Jokes by Angela Rieck

March 24, 2023 by Angela Rieck Leave a Comment

Dad jokes have recently become popular, especially on Twitter.

What is a Dad Joke? A Dad Joke is a short, rarely funny, but sometimes amusing, joke. Frequently, Dad Jokes are puns or one-liners. (In my experience, the only people who think puns are funny are those who are telling them.) Since they are Dad Jokes, often the humor can be understood and appreciated by children.

So, I decided to look into the history of Dad Jokes. While these jokes have been around forever, the derivation of this term has a nebulous history—mainly because I couldn’t find its history.

Some attribute its nomenclature to a 1987 Gettysburg Times column under the headline “Don’t ban the ‘Dad’ jokes; preserve and revere them.” A sitcom and an Australian quiz show used the term regularly and may have been responsible for its current name.

Perhaps there is someone out there who has a definitive origin story, but for now, we can just say that these harmless, sweet jokes have gained popularity. You can find a daily Dad Joke on Twitter, and a weekly Dad Joke on a sports show.

It is just a light touch to the day. My nephew sends his father a Dad Joke each day and my brother-in-law forwards them to us. Here are couple of my nephew’s jokes just to make you (perhaps) chuckle.

I’m afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered.”
My husband has been gone for a week. The police said to prepare for the worst, so I went to the Thrift Store and bought his clothing back.
Plateaus are the highest form of flattery.
Received a text from the wife saying that she was breaking up with me. Imagine how relieved I was when a couple of minutes later she texted: ‘sorry, wrong number.’
Tesla founder Elon Must is originally from South Africa, which is strange. You’d think that he was from Mad-at-gas-car.
Remember when plastic surgery was a taboo subject? Now you mention Botox, and nobody raises an eyebrow.
Two antennas got married. The wedding was okay, but the reception was incredible.
Which body part is the most reliable? Well, you can always count on your fingers.
Did you know that Albert Einstein had a younger brother named Frank? He was a monster.
I got in a fight with 1,3,5,7 & 9. The odds were against me.
People call me self-centered. But that is enough about them.
You think gas prices are high, have you seen chimneys? They’re through the roof.
Can trees poop? Yes, how else do we get Number 2 pencils? (Kids love this one.)
They’ve tried to improve the efficiency of wind farms by playing country music around them, but it’s not working because they’re big heavy metal fans.
What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
Dad, can you put my shoes on? Sorry, but I don’t think they’ll fit me.
The salesclerk asks a customer at paint store: Do you wanna box for that? Reply: No, I am against violence, can I pay with a credit card instead?
I used to play piano by ear. Now I use my hands.
You know, people say they pick their nose, but I was just born with mine.
What did the fish say when he hit the wall? Dam.

Oh well, it was a slow news day…

From and Fuller: The Politics of a Trump Indictment and the DeSantis Backtrack on Ukraine

March 23, 2023 by Al From and Craig Fuller Leave a Comment

Every Thursday, the Spy hosts a conversation with Al From and Craig Fuller on the most topical political news of the moment.

This week, From and Fuller discuss the political implications of an expected indictment of former president Donald Trump. Al and Craig also trade thoughts on the recent statement by Florida Governor Ron DeSantis, who appeared to be backtracking from his noted skepticism about America’s involvement in a “territorial” conflict.

We end with a short outtake with Craig recalling a photo and story from his days as the campaign director of the Bush for President campaign in 1988.

This video podcast is approximately sixteen minutes in length.

To listen to the audio podcast version, please use this link:

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