We all want one, but when the week concludes we are not likely to have either a confession or a recantation in the presentations by Professor Ford or Judge Kavanaugh. What Perry Mason coaxed out of a witness on the stand was more clarity about reality than we are likely to see in real life. Why? Because both of the principals involved here have a very clear view of their own reality.

I hasten to add; it is evident that inappropriate behavior decades ago left a deep scar in one individual. It is equally clear that the accused party has led a life that honors and respects others and thus created for him a reality where inappropriate behavior is not now or ever part of his reality.

While there can be only one truth, Professor Ford and Judge Kavanaugh believe in realities that, while in total conflict, are real and totally convincing to them.

I’ve witnessed this before. During investigations into alleged wrongdoing in government, I experienced people I knew stating what they believed to be true. The thing was, it wasn’t. When I asked counsel how this could be and why would misstate facts, I learned something interesting. The explanation was that they had been telling themselves a story about an event over and over to the point where the only thing they believed is what they created in their own reality. And, they believed it so totally, they would easily pass a lie detector test.

It turns out; there is a name for this: the Rashomon Effect.

One online summation reads in part:

… every time you remember something, you rewrite it in your brain. If that recollection contains errors, you’ll strengthen those errors until you’re positive they’re correct.

The last thing I would suggest is that a traumatic event never occurred. But, lacking corroboration by witnesses, friends who had the story shared contemporaneously, or evidence gathered at the scene, we are left with two realities believed with equal conviction and articulated in ways that only solidify the preconceived views of those who will hear the testimony offered by two people locked in a conflict.

So, as much as we want to see a moment when, as in the Perry Mason show, one party cracks and only one reality remains as “the truth,” we are unlikely to experience such a nice neat result.

My assumption is that a vote will occur in the Senate on the nomination of Judge Kavanaugh consistent with where people were before this eleventh-hour revelation came to pass.

However, even without a moment where a single truth is revealed, it would be a mistake to avoid taking a few teachable moments out of this wrenching experience.

For some reason, I’ve found myself engaged in numerous discussions about the Ford/Kavanaugh situation. Some were sensitive, and several were anything but. It strikes me that there are three distinct groups of people: those who engaged in some form of inappropriate behavior; those who experienced inappropriate behavior; and, then, a group (which I believe I am in) who experienced neither of the above. What I find a bit shocking is that the “none of the above group” may well be the smallest of the three.

Following discussions with women for whom I have great respect, whether in person or in reading what they are writing, it seems that most recall with varying clarity inappropriate actions by another person. Certainly, there is a wide range of degree, and most suggest they just moved past the experience. But, the teachable moment here is that the experience remains an unpleasant memory with a life impact that is hard to judge.

Notice should be taken by all people, that inappropriate acts and unwelcomed advances have consequences. People want to connect with others. But, inappropriate actions can do harm, and those actions should never be excused as “well everyone does it.” Truth is, that is not true.

These days, inappropriate actions don’t just occur at parties. They happen online in the virtual world. These, too, are damaging forms of interaction that can have long-lasting effects.

We clearly need more focus on respect when it comes to human interaction. This needs to be the underlying value when developing a relationship with others. Whether casual or something else, mutual respect will get people past something that does harm for decades.

There is another teachable moment….

It goes to the process that has us where we are today.

Contemporaneous reporting really is important. I understand how people hesitate, I think. But, time works in no one’s favor, least of all the individual who has experienced the inappropriate behavior.

Then, public officials have an obligation to take appropriate action when they learn of the alleged offenses. Again, in my experience during government service, people did come to me with allegations of improper actions. It was always my policy to indicate that if provided with information suggesting wrongdoing, I had an obligation to take an action. I simply refused to be entrusted with information about improper conduct of any kind without doing something as a public official.

I have known Senator Diane Feinstein for decades since our days in California. The determination to withhold an allegation of wrongdoing by a nominee to the Supreme Court makes no sense. The timely and confidential consideration of this issue could have provided the best chance of learning the truth before the public uproar we are now experiencing.

When someone takes the time to document a recollection of wrongdoing, that individual deserves to be heard, and the allegation should be investigated and resolved if at all possible. In any FBI background check (and, I’ve participated in dozens of them involving other people) the question is always asked along the lines of, “is there any reason you know of that might make the appointment or security clearance inappropriate?” And, the answer given really is confidential.

When a public official has knowledge, even if it is not from direct experience, they have an obligation to inform the proper authorities.

Wherever you settle on the question of confirming Judge Kavanaugh, I think you will have to get there without the truth of a high school incident being fully unmasked. But, I hope we take the time to reflect on some of the important elements this debate has unmasked that impact the lives of so many. Today, we need to focus at least as much attention on what appropriate, mutually respectful conduct means as we focus on the breaking news around the tragic allegation of improper behavior in decades past.

Craig Fuller served four years in the White House as assistant to President Reagan for Cabinet Affairs, followed by four years as chief of staff to Vice President George H.W. Bush. Having been engaged in five presidential campaigns and run public affairs firms and associations in Washington, D.C., he now resides on the Eastern Shore with his wife Karen.

Readers of the Spy know full well that an election is approaching this November. Our airwaves will fill with political ads and street corners will see signs for candidates filling all space available.

Into this environment those of us engaged in launching the 21st Annual Craft Show at the Academy Art Museum must bravely go. Rather than resist, we decided to embrace the spirit of the time with early stickers for car windows and store windows (Thank you Piazza for being the first!). Later look for our Meet the Artist lawn signs!

When we ask people to Vote Early! And, Vote Craft! we want you to do two important things: vote with your feet and attend the Craft Show on October 19-21; and, check out our first-ever online version of the Show, Dazzled Online.

The Academy Art Museum Craft Show celebrates the 70 artists who are coming to Easton from around the country bringing the product of their creative talents. We will be reaching out over the weeks ahead through Dazzled Online to tell the stories of our featured artists and to show people the quality of the work that will be available at the Craft Show and through the online auction.

You can stay in touch with developments over the next few weeks by registering now at Dazzled Online and when the auction goes live on October 1st, we hope you will consider placing a bid or two.

All proceeds from Dazzled Online and from the Craft Show go to the Academy Art Museum to assist in the fulfillment of the mission.

Craig Fuller remains a regular commentator at the Spy, but he is taking time to serve as Chairman of the 2018 Academy Art Museum Craft Show. He is also a Trustee of the Museum.