The Sorest Loser of All Time by Steve Parks

I’ve always felt there was nothing more unattractive than “I told you so,” but now I know something worse–far worse than that. And his name is Donald Trump, lame duck, sore loser of all time president of the United States.

I’ve written from time to time in this cyberspace about this man’s total unfitness to be our commander in chief. The I-told-you-so part comes from having edited coverage of this jerk–that’s the kindest word I can say about him–for decades on Long Island and New York City. He was a joke. No one with any sense, regardless of political persuasion, took him seriously, except if you were unfortunate enough to do business with him. He could bankrupt you by his notorious modus operandi. He hired independent mom-and-pop contractors, rarely big corporations so that when it came time to honor his contract with them, he would pay 20 to 40 cents on the dollar and dare you to sue him. Mom-and-pops couldn’t afford to take him to court. And he got away with it for decades.

He has no political or moral convictions whatsoever. Nor is he even aware of what an idiot he makes of himself owing to his psychotically overrated estimation of his wherewithal. I almost fell out of my newsroom chair in laughter, listening to Donald pretending to be his own publicist. We couldn’t figure out whether he did this because he was too cheap to hire a professional or that he thought he could do a better job himself. One thing was clear: He never listened to anyone who might tell him he was making a damn fool of himself. This is long before he even ventured into the political arena by claiming with zero evidence that Barack Obama was born in Kenya or Indonesia–who knows?–Mars. Anywhere but in the USA.

My point is that maybe in my participation in coverage of this megalomaniac of minimal qualifications for anything beyond carnival barker, I was, among my colleagues, in a better position to peg this guy as disaster-in-chief. There’s a phrase for guys like Trump in far lesser positions of power than he found himself in. He doesn’t now nor ever has known his ass from a hole in the ground. I hardly exaggerate when I say that everyone I have ever known–possibly excluding the dead, though they would do less damage than Donald–would make a better president than Trump.

OK. So here’s what I REALLY think of Donald, the demented, deranged, delusional, damnable, and dangerous: He will bring you down if you continue to support and make excuses for this unchallenged title holder of Sorest Loser of All Time.

The House of Representatives should convene as soon as possible to listen to the hour-long harangue of Donald Trump committing sedition against the Constitution he was sworn to uphold, badgering Georgian Republicans to manufacture just enough votes to put him over the top. Citing thousands of dead who voted in the Nov. 3 election, he was informed that the number was actually 2–both of whom cast invalid ballots FOR Trump.

Upon listening to this obscene assault on democracy and the rule of law that is supposed to cover us all, presidents not excepted, the House should vote immediately to impeach Trump and send the indictment to the Senate for an up-and-down vote the next day. The 25th Amendment might be a more appropriate measure, except that the toad who calls himself vice president will never be on board.

Donald Trump needs to be gone. Now. All the insults he slings at his imagined enemies apply directly to him.

Fake. Disgraceful. Treasonous. How about just plain stupid?

Add up all the hits–all of them deserved–that he has taken from the New York Times, the Washington Post, news networks excepting (though not so much lately) Fox–none of this even collectively has inflicted as much damage on Trump as he inflicts on himself. He’s a moron, ignoramus, liar, and imposter. Listen to this obscene hour of sedition recorded by Republicans and leaked because even they realize he’s unhinged from reality. Then tell me you continue to support this insanely brainless would-be dictator. He’s our worst constitutional nightmare. And thankfully, hopefully, he will be gone very soon, though not soon enough.

Donald talks, ridiculously, of having won in Georgia by “hundreds of thousands” of votes while at the same time complaining that the number of COVID dead is “wildly” exaggerated. Donald could give a damn, as he has proven by his pandemic negligence, about the very life and death of “ordinary” Americans. All he cares about is staying in the White House long enough to outlast the felony statute of limitations on potential New York state charges against him. But now he’s added Georgia state charges as well. I suppose if he manages to get himself self-appointed president for life, he’ll outlast that statute of limitation as well.

Never mind all that. The president had no New Year’s message for the nation. But I have two words, especially for surviving Trump supporters, and for all of us as well: President Biden.

Meanwhile, there is massive election fraud going on right now. Donald is hitting on his supporters for contributions to support “investigations” into the election he lost to Joe Biden by a wide margin. And Sen. Josh Hawley of Missouri, who stepped up first to say he would object to Congress’s Electoral College certification, has likewise widely solicited donations for a similarly non-existent investigation. Both are nakedly fraudulent enterprises: Trump’s to line his pockets in order to survive the avalanche of legal costs he will incur once he’s evicted from the White House and Howley’s so he can run for president in 2024. Both of these grifters are counting on fools to rush in with their wallets. For heaven’s sake, give to your favorite charity instead in this new and hopefully far better new year than 2020.

Steve Parks is a retired New York journalist now living in Easton.