There are moments when we are lucky enough to see just how much work we still have to do. These are the times that galvanize us out of the complacency of believing “it’s different here,” or “it’s different now.” They are shocking and distressing, but we should appreciate these moments because they are preferable to the dull stagnancy of accepting a status quo as invisible as the air we breathe or, even worse, the quiet erosive slide of regression.
For some Chestertonians, news of the Town Council’s recent vote on permits for a Pride Celebration in Fountain Park was such a moment. To hear elected officials in this ostensibly close-knit, warm and friendly community espouse bigoted views and question their fellow citizens’—their constituents’—right to assemble in the public square for a family-friendly event designed to celebrate community members and build bridges among different parts of the population was disheartening and infuriating.
The second deadliest mass shooting in United States history took place at a gay nightclub, Pulse, in Orlando, Florida. 50 people died, and 53 more were injured. According to the FBI, more than 20% of hate crimes in the US are motivated by bias against sexual orientation or gender identity (commonly known as homophobia), second only to hate crimes motivated by racism. Even without considering acts and attitudes of discrimination and bigotry experienced by LGBTQ Americans that don’t rise to the level of hate crimes (including those displayed in the Chestertown Town Council last week), this statistic illustrates the significant hatred and intimidation that is directed towards LGBTQ people in America.
Leaving aside the panoply of legal and ethical reasons why denying a permit for this event would have been wrong and why the arguments that were made against it were destructive to the fabric of this community, this sobering statistic shows us why an enthusiastic and supportive YES to a Pride Celebration is the only correct answer if a town expects to be known as a place of acceptance, where all community members know that they can enjoy their full rights as citizens to a life free from intimidation and harassment. A resounding YES to a Pride Celebration is the only answer if a town wants to fight back against hatred and move toward a day when the promise of freedom, opportunity, and equality is a reality for all its citizens.
An unqualified YES is the only answer if a town wants to show its LGBTQ youth that they are championed, valued, and loved. And an emphatic YES is the only answer for a town that wants all its citizens and the wider world to know that bigotry and hatred of any kind have no home here. For if we allow discrimination and intolerance against one group, no group is safe.
The permit was granted, albeit by a close margin, and the event will go on. Chestertown excels at parades and festivals, and this one will surely not disappoint. It will be an affirmation of the right of all Chestertown residents to exist and to celebrate who they are and who they love. For after all, love is the operative word. As composer Lin-Manuel Miranda put it on the night of the Pulse nightclub shooting:
We lived through times when hate and fear seemed stronger;
We rise and fall and light from dying embers,
Remembrances that hope and love last longer
And love is love is love is love is love is love is love is love cannot be killed or swept aside.
May the morning of May 4 dawn bright and clear this year, and may a beautiful spring afternoon provide the backdrop for a joyful celebration in Fountain Park, a celebration in which the LGBTQ people of this community can be themselves: openly, proudly, and secure in knowledge that their town accepts, appreciates, and embraces them.
Maria Wood returned to academic life in 2014, after a two-decade career in the music business, earning a BA in American Studies and a Certificate in Ethnomusicology from Smith College in 2018. Most recently, she served as Deputy Campaign Manager for Jesse Colvin for Congress.
John and Ellyn Vail says
Thank you, Maria. So nicely put.
Hugh Silcox says
I grew up in Chestertown (well, mostly in Kennedyville …) as a closeted Gay kid.
Back then (I was a member of Chestertown High School’s last graduating class, in 1971), the notion of “acceptance” was only a dream — a dream I couldn’t imagine becoming reality. I knew the perils of revealing my true self in my hometown. I would have been subjected to ridicule, ostracization … or worse. I assumed I would be entirely cut off from my family. My sexuality was my own demon; I could not fathom the possibility I would find a loving companion. I would be completely alone in the world.
I remained closeted for more than twenty years. Fear is an incredibly powerful force and does not make for a healthful life.
Chestertown has changed immensely in those twenty years. The May 4th event in the Park is only one signal of that change, but a bright, shining symbol.
The opposition to the Pride event is regrettable — a sad last gasp from an element who still wallows in fear — fear of change, fear of “the other,” fear of the reality I myself was too timid to acknowledge those many years ago.
Congratulations! If anyone wonders at what “pride” signifies in this context, know that Chestertown can be truly proud of its demonstrable love and acceptance (!) of folk who only want to love and be loved.
Kathleen James-Chakraborty says
Like Hugh, who I remember very well, I grew up in Chestertown. At least three of my friends who lived there with me died of AIDs; I think of them almost every day. Their lives were much more difficult than mine simply because they were born with a different sexual orientation. They were talented, kind and very witty, and I am sure I am not the only one to miss them enormously. Today I would like to think that they would be completely accepted in the community which they so enriched by their presence. I now live in Dublin where our Prime Minister is a forty-year old gay man, who is doing a terrific job negotiating for Ireland in the teeth of the Brexit crisis. He is an eminently decent human being, whose father immigrated to Dublin from India, and I am proud to now live in a society so much more accepting than the one in which I grew up. It is time for Chestertown to continue to progress. It is not, after all, by nature a hateful place.
Hugh Silcox says
Thank you, Kathleen, for your very poignant recollections. I am very fortunate to have survived the Epidemic; the closet is unhealthy in many ways.
It’s good to hear from you.
Susan Drumheller says
Their are many things I dont support and this event is one. I don’t support KKK parades or Womens rights for Abortion, whether it’s a march or parade. I don’t hate the people, I dislike the choice they make which sets trends that are unnatural, ungodly and create negativity in our environment. One act leads to another and another creating moral decay. Its a cycle that brings unwelcome lifestyles. San Francisco is a classic example of how a city ended up. New York now approaching an all time low in moral decay over abortion provisions. Waco Texas was an example of a man who claimed to love and be loved, all unnatural mind set. When we support more and more of these unnatural, twisted ways of living, we move further away from Godly living. You aren’t hated, I can love the individual but not the lifestyle or choice. The law is binding, your right is your right.
Hugh Silcox says
Ms Drumheller,
My initial, reflexive, response to you letter was one of anger. That anger has, however, been replaced by sadness. You live in a world defined by bitterness, disdain, and a smug sense of your own moral superiority. Your narrow definition of “natural” and “godly” (not, by the way, supported by Scripture) has shut you off from the abundance the Creator has provided us all. And that saddens me.
Jeff D'Aquila says
Dear Editor:
As a frequent visitor from Philadelphia to Chestertown, I have come to love the place and the people.
Watching the exchange about the PFLAG-sponsored Mid-shore Pride event from afar, I am struck that citizens of Chestertown are debating rights. While not a legal scholar, I believe our Constitution guarantees rights of expression and assembly. Maryland, in particular, has afforded housing and employment rights to its citizens so that neither can be withheld based on gender identity and sexual orientation.
There are many misconceptions about LGBTQ rights. Eleven US states offer no employment protection for LGBTQ citizens, and 26 states offer no housing protection. That means in those states, people may be excluded from employment or housing based on their sexual orientation and gender identity. Title VII, contrary to misconceptions, offers protections based on sex, race, skin color, national origin and religion. It does not stipulate rights for LGBTQ citizens.
While it may be true that some of us have never seen rights denied to LGBTQ people, I’ve witnessed harassment, threats of violence and mistreatment of LGBTQ people. I’ve personally experienced some of those things myself.
I’m looking forward to the event, and am wishing for a bright, sunny day for which to celebrate our mutual respect and compassion for one another.
Jeff D’Aquila
Philadelphia, PA
Sally Murray James says
Thank you for this thoughtful piece. We will no longer need Pride events when homophobic slurs have disappeared from every playground, when young people who are straight come out because no one makes assumptions about orientation, and when council members in every town across the country represent their LGBTQ constituents with openness and understanding. I had hoped we were closer to that day. The divided vote of the council would have scared me when I was growing up in Chestertown in the 1970s, it would have angered me when my friends were dying of AIDs in the 19980s, and it shocks me now.